Ang Mo in Wonderland

They say there are two things you can do in Singapore. You can eat and you can shop. That's it. Of course that is not really true, but an exaggeration to please small minds that can only think in aphorisms and slogans. In fact, there are no less than three things you can do in Singapore. Because you can also be a tourist, meaning: seeing sights and going on rides. Here it is part of the way of life, especially when you are an Ang Mo. Ang Mo's are easy to spot. They are tall, pale red haired creatures in bright t-shirts and shorts. They come in a couple of varieties: with and without huge cameras, with and without huge backpacks, with and without designer sandals and the female of this species that the Thai call ‘Farang’ have sometimes been known to go out in nothing more than a see through skirt and g string underwear. They are a usually friendly, but often kind of loud bunch that seems to have permeated almost every country in the world, specifically those where the eating and shopping is good.

Now, I don’t have read hair, but that doesn’t matter. To the Singaporeans I am close and pale enough, so I am definitely an Ang Mo or ‘Red Hair’. And I go where the Ang Mos go. I shop, I eat and I take the breathtaking cable car ride to the Island of Santosa. I check out the Raffles Hotel. I walk around In colorful batik shirts. And yesterday I finally got in to the ultimate ride: the Night Safari. It’s like going to the zoo in the dark. A smart move because a) all the nocturnal animals are wide awake and b) you fill in all the dark places with your imagination. Of course the jungle here is kind of real already. The temperature matches, there is no need to fidget around with cans of eau de jungle or set up speakers to produce some nice cricket sounds. But something about it being dark makes it more real and probably larger than life. Especially since you can actually walk through this jungle. Especially because you have some really close encounters with the animals. Ever gotten buzzed by a flying squirrel the size of a cat? Well, since yesterday I have and teher are no words to describe it.Then there’s the actual ride. You hover gently trough the night past all kinds of animals (that are naturally all just having dinner in the perfect spot, bathing in what seems moonlight before they go back to their trailers and throw a fit because their contract specifically states ‘grass from the south face of the lower Himalayan Terrai). It’s all perfect: even the Tiger takes extra special care to hide a little and slowly come forth from the evening mist. Ever you ever get the chance: go there. Go there and say ‘hi’ from this Ang Mo.